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Life Builders By Julie Hamilton

Jun 27, 2019

“When we aim at the target of performance, maturity always suffers. But when we aim at the target of maturity, the performance goes off the charts.”

This is one of the best parenting episodes we've ever had! Janet Newberry shows us how growing up in a performance based culture & education system harms our children, ourselves and our relationships. Thankfully, we have a choice to live free by design and not stay stuck in the default.  In this episode, we chat about the differences between design vs default, how to know whether we're performing for others or being our true selves, and why parenting should not be transactional (striving to earn our next privilege), but transformational (built on a trust relationship & help) and so much more!! Janet is the host of the Brave Love Podcast, one of my go-to podcasts that is making me a much more effective parent and I count it as a privilege to have her on the show!

In this chat, we also talked about: 

-Their grand adventure- traveling the US and living in an Airstream named Freedom 

-wearing the "good enough" mask

-perils of a performance based culture

-breaking the perform & pain relief cycle most of us live in

-how work is different than performing

-the default mindset in the education system

-breaking codependency 

-What is my God given instinct? 

-finding courage to move from codependent to confident

-crisis in the dishes section

-the cost of finding your voice

-redeeming childhood

-creating transformational, maturing relationship with our children

-helping our children mature

-learning to "be me"


Follow Janet's journey & John 15 Academy at , on FB at Janet Newberry, and IG 


Resources mentioned in this episode

Brave Love Podcast by Janet & Doug Newberry

"Education by Design, Not Default: How brave love creates fearless learning" by Janet Newberry

John 15 Academy with Janet Newberry


"The Cure: What if God Isn't Who You Think He Is and Neither are You?" by Trueface 

"The Cure & Parents" by Bill Thrall & Trueface

Trueface Podcast

"Unwanted: How Sexual Brokenness Reveals the Way to Our Healing" by Jay Stringer 

"Beloved Chaos: Moving from Religion to Love in a Red Light District" by Jamie West Zumwalt